Saying of the Day

I don't know who first said this, but I appreciate the quote:
"You can not lose what you have freely given."

Even after you have experienced loss, you can still decide to freely let it go, let it be as it is. Ultimately, nothing real is ever lost.

In a collection of private writings (see the book,"Come Be My Light"), Mother Teresa claimed that if you are suffering, it is because there is something you are not giving to the Divine. Perhaps if we give everything, there is truly nothing to lose.

Guardian Angel

Fact: The Bible speaks of angels. Angels are described in the Hebrew and Christian Bibles. Christian Protestants aren't too big on angels though because we don't believe humans need intermediaries between God and individuals; Protestants believe that we are able to have a direct relationship with God without having to pray to saints, angels and the like. While there is a theological reason for shying away from angels if you're a traditional Protestant, I think there's more to it. I think we also shy away from "angel stuff" because it's come to be just too associated with New Age (a term that is usually said with disdain by "proper" Christians).

Nonetheless, there is something appealing to me about angels. Part of me likes the idea of having a guardian angel. Certainly, it is comforting to believe that each person has a guardian angel (particularly if that person is a suffering child). But isn't it enough to yearn for God? To desire that God is comforting us, protecting us? There's the image of two sets of footprints becoming one set . . . with the accompanying text, "it was then that I carried you" says God.

Still the appeal of angels remains for me. Very unProtestant of me, I know. As with many of my attachments and desires, I am choosing to believe that this one is the case of the right instinct but the wrong form. (Wha--??) I mean: the desire or pull I feel toward angels is a spiritual instinct that is right on track, but I've misinterpreted it. I have always focused on wanting to have a guardian angel, wanting to feel its presence in my life as though that would be the only way I could feel God's nearness. Now, I have to consider that perhaps my angel longing instinct isn't about having a guardian angel, but about being a guardian angel. Now my desire is no longer purely selfish, but agentic, empowering, (dare I use the word?): "vivifying."

Instead of cowering under the wing of an angel, I prefer the stronger, more faith-filled image of being the angel to all the people God has sent into my day. I can quietly rest in a secret assurance that I know . . .and that I can communicate without words that I know that there is nothing to fear because ultimately there is only One Power, One Life, One Love.

As if bursting my own idealistic bubble, I have to admit that this new image would likely quickly fizzle in the face of real crisis, but frankly that just doesn't matter. I can "be" an angel and have plenty to do in the little mundane interactions of my life right now. I accept that I am merely practicing being an angel. I can only hope that when I need to rise to the occasion of a "real" crisis, that either I will meet the challenge or that I will be forgiven for all too humanly failing. After all, I'm not a perfect saint; as an angel, I don't have to "succeed," I just have to keep trying.

Signed,
B.N. Angel ;-)

Healing Dreams

It was a lazy prayer that led to interesting results and a growing social experiment. I was lying in bed before falling asleep for the night, thinking about my day, reviewing all the little ways I fell short of my spiritual ideals in a mere 16 hours, and how I'm really at my best lying down quietly, undisturbed and in the dark. I wondered how many years (decades) I'd just keep repeating the same vices day after day-- impatience, self-indulgence, envy, etc. etc. Out of frustration and desperation, I decided to pray, "I don't let You in much during the day, but I'm willing to surrender completely to You while I sleep." (How daringly generous of me). I repeated my prayer and fell asleep. The next morning I felt as though something had shifted for the better.

A friend of mine tried something similar. She decided that she would trust (just for sleeping but not waking time) that God was working in and through her in healing ways even if she couldn't understand it. Like me, she wasn't quite willing to surrender completely (or in her case, "at all") during the day (when "we" want to be in charge --ha, ha), but there was a tiny willingness, a bit of trust we could offer at night. She prayed for healing dreams and said she had wonderful dreams, qualitatively different than any other. Moreover, when she did have "bad" dreams, they seemed to come with less of a sting during the dream or with less of a bad-dream-hangover afterwards.

We were amazed at our results. We shared our stories with friends and family. Everyone who tried our little experiment in evening surrender reported positive if not profound results.

Spread the news. Experiment for yourself. Commit to giving it a try for two weeks. Then tell me what happened as a result!

Thank you, Jackie

I don't know Jackie but she has greatly impacted my spiritual development. My friend, Annie, worked with her at one point in her life and told me bits and pieces about Jackie: she was in a miserable job with an oppressive, bullying, tyrant of a boss. She had no choice but to stay in that job. Annie would say that Jackie seemed to handle her burden so well. She'd sing her religious songs while working. It makes me think that those who sung those old traditional "negro spirituals" knew something about coping from which we can still learn.

Often when I grumble about something, I think of Jackie-- a faceless presence in my mind-- who I imagine would sweetly scoff at my "struggles." Then, I wonder "what would Jackie do" and sing out loud (if I'm alone or just have my child trapped in the car with me) or I hum. I intentionally stick to singing only religious and spiritual songs. I usually have to make up some of the words which is always worth a good laugh.

And so, I'm with my own burden, but not. Even though my feet and hands may be situated in an old, mired gully, when I sing my spirituals I am lifted out of that gully. Another part of me gets to flow to a better place.

Thank you, Jackie--- whoever or where ever you are!

breath of serenity

I imagine that God is breathing through me. I'm not breathing. God is. My body is like a sheer curtain through which God is moving in, through, and around.

It's instantaneous. I feel immediately more relaxed. I have "soft eyes."

I try to remember this mini exercise throughout the day.

Song: Come Rain or Come Shine

Come Rain or Come Shine
I’ve modified this popular song to make the lyrics sound more like a traditional spiritual. The original song was written by Harold Arlen with lyrics by Johnny Mercer. The song was written for the musical St. Louis Woman, and was first published in 1946.

God did love me like no one can love me
Come rain or come shine
High as a mountain and deep as a river
Come rain or come shine

And I guess when I met God
That it was just one of those things
Girl, don’t you forget God
But remember just to let God, just to let God

God’s gonna love me like no one did love me
Come rain or come shine
Happy together, unhappy not ever
Won’t it be fine

Day may be cloudy or sunny
I’m in or I’m out of the money
But God loves us always
God loves us rain or shine
Rain or shine

Oprah's Weight Gain & a Spiritual Lesson

I recently read an article about Oprah's recent weight gain. She was quoted as saying, "It's embarrassing . . . I know all the things I need to do [eat right, exercise, etc.]" (paraphrased).

Dear Oprah,
Guess what? Some problems exist despite what we know and despite our best ambitions. Contrary to our cultural mantra that we "can accomplish anything we set our minds to," some areas of our lives are not fixed by sheer will power. This is the spiritual lesson.

It may be a harder lesson to learn for an Oprah Winfrey or Tom Cruise of the world-- that is, for those many people who seem to view their successes as having come about due to their own, personal will power, drive, and ambition (all of which, I believe, a person is born with to a great degree).

Sometimes we have to accept there are things we cannot change (an oft neglected part of the Serenity Prayer).

Other times, the problem is that we fail to accept the up-and-down cycles of life. Instead, we view our "down times" as moments in which we must fight our way through. However, "what we resist will only persist" (A Course in Miracles, paraphrased). We fight "it" and "it" just digs in its heels. During these moments, a gentler, more spiritual way of coping is to acknowledge, "Ah, yes, this is my weak spot, my down cycle, and I will observe it and let it ride out its course, managing but not fighting it, until the eventual upswing occurs again."